Christmas 2010

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Nothing To Say

Gloomy day today and I have class at 1:30. There's not really much to say. Just felt like writing again. Thing is, I don't know what to write about. My brain's pretty much been been incapable of doing any writing the past couple of months. I haven't had much of a reason to write about anything since so much has been going on lately. So here's a quick thought, how hard is it to say goodbye? I dread to know the feeling.

Life..

So life and it's major complexities has gotten even more complex. Once again, everything just piles up on me. As always. This, people is how lucky at life I am. Every single day, I feel like everyone and everything's going against me. The whole world possibly and it's just getting to be too much. I wish i could disappear forever. I know some people would like that, but unfortunately, it's not that easy..

I don't know what I did to make soo many people want to talk about my life. Honestly, I'm not just assuming things but it's so clear that it's like mere entertainment for people. Especially in this town to talk about the rise and the downfall's of people. When did talking about problem's about other people get to be so fun?! I just wish that people would stop and listen to both sides of the story before making assumptions. It hurts to have to hear shit talk about this and that when that's not even the half of it. You all wish you knew, but honestly you don't. It sucks to know that some of the people you thought you knew, wanna ruin your life so badly. I just don't get it. It hurts and I don't know what to do anymore..

Anyways, that's life. Like I always say, If it doesn't kill you it only makes you stronger..

Keep Your Friends Close, and Your Enemies Closer

Frenemies- adj. people who act like your friends but are really your enemies.

I guess a few of us here or there have had our own share of the so called " fair-weathered friends". I know i sure have and it's actually pretty disgusting. The friends who are there for you when it's all fun and games but when the going gets tough, where are they to be found? NOWHERE. But I'm glad to say that I now know a handful of who my true friends really are. And it's really satisfying to finally learn that, after years of endless laughter and jokes but at the same time deeply saddening. That's life for ya!! If it doesn't kill you it only makes you stronger, after all, right?

Anyways, after it's all said and done, some things never change. Or some people, rather. I'd rather waste my time talking to people about substantial things rather than that girl who just walked into the room not wearing the latest in spring fashion. haha. And yes, I admit, I used to be one of those girls who wasted my time talking about her, her and him. But after a few hefty realizations, it's just not me anymore. It's useless and gets you absolutely nowhere in life, unfortunately. Although it was a bit fun at times, like a guilty pleasure, almost. Anyways people, at the end of the day when we leave high school and go our separate ways, are the same people from high school still going to stick by us? College is going to define who we will become in the future. And no amount of social status is going to save us then. So time check! High school's almost over, for some of us at least and thus the high school of life begins. Anyways, that's all for now. I'm out! :)

Party filled weekend, so much fun and Judd's leaving on Tuesday. It was his last weekend here in Cebu and It's pretty damn sad. :( I'm home, sober and left alone to my thoughts. And where does this lead me? It leads me to thinking of a lot of random thoughts about random people that have popped up into my life in these past few months. Sadly, only one pops up into my mind and hasn't stopped for the past week or so...I miss you, whoever you are, dammit!! I just had to let that one out.

Next weekend is Sinulog weekend and that means party timeeee!! Ahh how exciting. But, I won't think about it until about Thursday or so, just so that I don't jinx my fun on that weekend. Even talking about it now could possibly jinx my fun so what the heck...Went to CDU today and all I have to say is that I AM THE BIGGEST HYPOCRITE IN THE WORLD. I was the only one in my barkada who was soooo anti nursing, and now, look at me. Signing up to take the test. HAY NAKO. Haha oh well, we'll see where this takes me. My parent's are extremely happy, nonetheless so maybe that gives me a little more. And my whole family's extremely proud that I'm even going in this direction. So... Maybe this is my calling. Even after all the blondie moment's I've had, I'm still going this direction. Just to prove all you people wrong ;) HEHEHEH. :) Okay this is enough for the evening. Just had to air some random stuff out. Later.

There's Still A Little Bit Of You Laced With My Doubt

I've been stuck in bed ALL DAY long watching movies and sleeping. Sick, yet again. Sore throat and a cough. AHHH, it's almost the weekend so I better be getting better, QUICK!

I've been sooo mingaw for Christmas Vacation lately. I guess I just miss the people I spent it with and all the laughs and quick-witted jokes that came along with it. Even if I didn't spend it with my girls or any special guy in particular, I made sooo many new friends and got closer to a lot of different people I wouldn't have expected to... and I don't wish to have it any other way. Thanks to those who made my break super memorable!

Sinulog's next weekend already and I'm so pumped! People coming into town from all different places, what more could you ask for? And to those who can't make it :( Wish you were here. Brain's frozen. Don't have anything good to say today. :)) Later.

Won't Go Home Without You

You know how you get this amazing feeling that you just sometimes wish would...stick? Or how you meet a person, create an inexplainable connection(or so you thought) and wish they would just stick around...forever? Like the good ol' saying goes "All good things must come to an end." And i just haven't been able to stop thinking about it lately but I just feel empty. As much as I try to preoccupy myself with useless ramblings, I always end up going back to the same thing that makes me feel the need to write these entries. Anyhow, enough of this bullshit, I wanna write about substantial things. When I get out of high school, I want to make something of myself. I don't wanna to be remembered to be this ordinary party girl who goes out too much and falls for the wrong guys, but I want to be remembered for doing something important or something great, even. I have to take note of that sometime. hahahah.

Remember how yesterday, I was talking about how prayer is a powerful thing? Well today, in our Christian Formation class...Our teacher made us each write on an index card "Please pray for whatever your name is for the year 2008 and then your birthday" so we threw those into this little thing and each picked one name each. Whatever name you got, you had to pray for that person this entire year from January up until December. So me and a classmate haven't exactly been on good terms lately. But it was weird because before we started picking names from the lot, I kind of said a little prayer saying that if we were meant to be friends again soon, then one of us would get each other's names. And sure enough, when my time came, I got her name. How weird is that? And there are 50 girls in our class, what are the chances of that??? I got the chills. And to think I was just talking about prayers yesterday. Hehe. Yes, random thoughts again, sorry!!!

On another note, I would kill to get one of those Starbucks planners!!! Helllp meeee?? :) Hope all you lazy folks are getting back into the groove of work and school once again. And keep in mind...My birthday's in THREE WEEKS. (February 3rd. take note of that) Hope you all know what you're getting me already, 18's a big thing!! HAHAHAH i'm kidding :) Ciao.